Overloaded

WOD:

25 burpees
10-8-6-4-2 front squats
10-8-6-4-2 hang cleans
25 burpees

Rx for women: 95#

I don't know why, but I walked into the gym feeling weird today. Different. Unmotivated. I've apparently got shin splints that have really been bothering me lately, so much so that I am not doing anything impact related this week per my own prescription. My tummy has been crummy for the last week, but that could have everything to do with the fact I've been doing creatine for about a week and a half. I'm not entirely sure I'm going to continue with it, but I've known several people who do get results from using it and thought it was worth a try. So far I can't say I'm having huge results, and I promise there's no pun intended there.

I used 75# today, which was a good weight for me. Challenging but not overwhelming amounts of weight. Thankfully, I did not psyche myself into thinking I needed to attempt this one as Rx'ed. I did the first set of burpees as Rx'ed with full blown push ups. The last set I did on my knees. I've seen lots of improvements in my push ups over the last month or so, which I'm proud of. Things like push ups and pull ups are my nemesis, so it's motivating to finally see some progress.

But something funny happened to me today during the weight portion of the WOD. I started crying.

For some reason, keeping my elbows up during front squats or at the bottom of squat cleans is always hard for me. I can tell I'm letting them drop, and I know better than to do it. At one point on rep 8 in the first set of hang cleans I just couldn't get the weight up. My whole body felt heavy, and the bar just wouldn't float for me. I was sweaty, hot, frustrated, and emotional. This was the second WOD I've ever done where I seriously considered walking away. In fact, I even let my mind go there about walking up to my coach, telling her I was outta there, and then getting my keys, getting in my car, and leaving.

Then I let my mind start wondering to what Coach Jodi would say if she could hear what I was thinking. She would say that what we do here at CrossFit is supposed to make us better outside the gym. Physically we will perform better when we train our bodies, and mentally we will perform better by taking the skills of focusing and motivating ourselves and others that we practice here in the box and taking that away with us. I started thinking about everything going on in my life right now. How, I asked myself, would I ever be able to handle some of the big chunks of life I've got on my plate if I can't make it through this WOD? Sure, it's hard, but it's not un-completeable. I just had to tell myself I was going to finish it, regardless of how long it took.

Just like overloading your bar can ruin your workout, or worse yet, end up in physical injury, being emotionally overloaded or having too many irons in the fire can be too much. For me, the emotional overload caught up to me today. I am packing up my family and moving several states away in a matter of weeks. I'm moving from a life of widowhood and single parenting of small children to that of a military wife (again), parenting kids who are definitely not little anymore, and hoping to add to the brood. I have said goodbye to my friends at church as of yesterday, and there are many more goodbyes yet to come. And while goodbyes are sad, in my opinion, they are also indicative of a new, untravelled road in life, one that will lead to more adventures, more precious friends, and irreplacable life experiences. I truly am excited about all the positive things that this move will bring, but right now I just need to put down the bar and cry. After I have come to terms with it, I will have to give myself a "3-2-1-GO!"

These are some of my 0830 girls. They are what keeps me going when, left to my own wiles, I would quit and walk away from a WOD. I definitely know how to push myself and go hard, but I have learned that you cannot place a price tag on sweat-forged camraderie and friends who will holler at you to believe in yourself and to keep pushing. Just looking at this picture makes me laugh out loud and cry at the same time.

Coach Jodi talked to us today about how the coaches' goals for us include not just focusing on coming and working out. They really want us to work hard while we're there and then focus on the rest of our lives, too. True, many of us -- myself included -- place a lot of emphasis on our time at CF CenTex, and maybe too much so. I'm glad I finished the WOD, because if I hadn't I would've been more upset about giving up on something that shouldn't have conquered me. But I also feel that the time I've spent up there has been well spent in the friendships I've made and learning the value of leaning on others.

Table For One in the "Smoked" Section

Holy shnikes, Batman. I am smoked this week. I participated in Warrior Dash in Forney, Texas, on Saturday. It was more of a fun run that anything, but I've never done a race or event at all, so I was super nervous. My cousin graciously ran with me and agreed before the race that she wouldn't leave me behind, so I did have a battle buddy to go through it with me. Come to find out the obstacles really weren't all that challenging, and the running part of it was broken down into manageable chunks. The hardest part was how uneven the "track" was since we were running through a pasture. I was experiencing a little pain in my legs by the end. It's kind of hard to pinpoint it. I couldn't really tell if it was my shins or my muscles along and behind them that were hurting. Either way, the running was the equivalent of a 5K, so it was a decent stretch of running -- think trail running here with tons of mud.



On Monday I pogued out and stayed in Dallas with my sister, so no workout that day. I was still tired from the hustle bustle from the weekend anyhow. But trust me, we made up for it for the rest of the week.

Tuesday, 04 MAY 10

WOD: 10 minutes of work at each station. Stations consist of 15 lb. ball slammers on your knees, prowler sprints, 10 lb. sledgehammers against a tractor tire, and tire flipping.

The key to doing the sledgehammers right was putting your hand up near the top of the tool and sliding it down to the bottom hand as you came over and down, planting your feet firmly and moving at the waist. Other than that, this was pretty easy. Just amazing how tired you can get after 10 minutes, though.

Wednesday, 05 MAY 10

WOD: 10-1 clean and jerks and 1-10 100m run for time

HA! This one kicked my butt in ways it has not been kicked since we did "Murph" back last fall. When I read this WOD, I wondered just how this was supposed to work. Let me break it down for you:

Round 1: 10 clean and jerks, run 100m
Round 2: 9 clean and jerks, run 200m
...
Round 10: 1 clean and jerk, run 1000m

As you decrease reps of C&J, you increase reps of running.

Rx for women was 95#. Personally, my clean max is 100# or so. My jerk max is somewhere around 85# or 90#. I ended up doing this, ambitiously, with 85#. What's funny is -- I DID IT! It took me a full round or so to get in my groove and work my form better but it got there. At first the feel of the weight trying to get it overhead was a little overwhelming, but I just kept getting one more and miraculously got it done. My right wrist was really giving me fits, though. This has been going on quite a little bit lately. I don't think I've hurt it, thankfully. I think it is just really weak and I've got to really watch my form so that the weakness doesn't set me up for injury. Taping it may have helped a little, but I have never messed with that before and don't know how to do that properly. One thing I know I need to work on is transitioning the grip b/w doing the cleans and the jerk portion of the movement. I know going into the jerk with my grip still poised from the clean is incorrect but due to the wrist stuff, I don't trust my wrist under the bar to bear that weight. Two days later, as I'm writing this, I can still feel where it was hurting and I could feel it during today's WOD, but we'll get to that in a minute.

By the end of this workout, we calculated that the running portion was roughly a 5K -- 3.44 miles -- and there were 55 reps of C&J. I ran another 200m with the girl who was finishing last due to some muscle issues, so I guess I went about 3.5 miles or so. Also, doing 55 reps of 85# means I lifted over 4600 total lbs of weight -- woo hoo!! I was feeling that leg crampy stuff like I had after WD, though... grrr...

The bottom line on this workout is that I pushed through uncomfortability and doubt about whether or not I could get that weight up. I don't think many women went very heavy on this workout, and but I wanted to do it as close to Rx'ed as possible and I still posted a good time. Then I proceeded to come home and sleep for two hours. :)

Posted time: 59:49

Friday, 07 MAY 10

WOD: 10 min. of kettlebell swings. Every minute on the minute, stop and do 10 push ups. Quit at the end of 10 min. or 150 reps, whichever comes first.

At first the word was that we were doing "Fran" today, which both scared and excited me at the same time. I haven't done "Fran" since last October, and I would like to see how much I have improved. Alas, they changed it up, but I know we'll be doing it again in the next week or so.

I'll be honest. I'm not a fan of the kettlebell. To me it seems like goofing off when you could be doing real work. This WOD didn't look very hard, and it wasn't until the last 90 seconds of it that I realized I may not actually get 150 reps. I used 1 pood and knocked out at least 25 swings before the first set of push ups. Then it got hard. It felt like I had just barely gotten back up and swinging before I had to stop again and do more stinkin' push ups! I did the first set of push ups on my toes but went to knees after that. Still, this one was just as hard for me mentally as Wednesday's WOD. I remember thinking, 'I hate this! Man, if I was doing this WOD at home, I would stop! This is BS!' And the sad fact is that, had I not been in a class with others to holler at me to keep moving or fellow athletes motivating me to keep pushing, I would've wimped out and been less of a competitor in my mind. This is a very real scenario for me, as I am moving in a month's time to a town where there is no CrossFit within a 45 minute drive of where I will live. It will be up to me to self-motivate, and quite frankly it scares me that I won't be able or willing to do it. But that's a sob story for a different day...

Thank God it's the weekend!

Posted reps: 132 with 1 pood